Cold Woman
by Blueezy
Summary: Renji complained that Rukia was a cold woman so she told him who she loved. A funny little ficlet.


EHhh I woke up late this morning so I didn't feel like having breakfast and wrote this instead. (well its pretty darn close to lunch) I suddenly felt inspired to try writing a Bleach ficlet and this is my first in writing ANY short ficlet. Took only a few min LOL. Enjoy.

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"Na ..Rukia, you're a real real cold woman d'you know that?" Renji commented as he escorted the small Shinigami woman back into her jail cell.

Strolling leisurely with her usual composed expression, Rukia merely raised one of her short eyebrow at the comment.

Knowing that she wasn't going to reply, Abarai Renji continued to speak. "I mean you've known me forever and now you even have that orange-haired kuso gaki practically bashing his head in to be in your good graces…..tell me, do you like either of us?"

Rukia stopped walking, turned to the taller man and looked up, capturing him with her large and perfectly dark eyes.

A thin layer of sweat started to form over the bridge of Renji's nose.

"I love you Renji." She said with all seriousness. Her heartfelt confession almost knocked the much bigger man to the ground.

Suddenly shy and self conscious, Renji could feel the heat of a blush starting to form on his cheeks. "Ahem," he choked out to mask his obvious joy at hearing Rukia admit her love for him. "Well let's go." He told her with mock grumpiness.

She gave him a slight nod and they resumed their journey to the jail cell with her walking in front while Renji "guarded" her back. Technically, his job was to make sure she didn't run but in his mind, Renji considered himself to be her bodyguard. While they walked, Renji kept his eyes fixed on the small woman before him. He was replaying her declaration of love in his mind, savoring the moment repeatedly while a nagging feeling was growing with each recollection. Waiiiiit a minute…….

"Oi, Rukia?"

"Yea?" She continued to walk without a backwards glance.

"How do you feel about the Ichigo guy?"

In the same staid tone she used before, Rukia turned to the man who was filled with anticipation and said, "I love Ichigo."

Renji could feel the eyelid of his right eye starting to contract involuntarily. He should've known it was too good to be true. "So," He started with a bitter tone in his voice. "Are you planning on settling down with either of us? Or do you plan to start a sordid little ménage à trios? Because I'm telling you now, if he's naked in bed, I am NOT getting in!"

Rukia slowly breathed in, then released a tired sigh. "Oh Renji.." She maintained her unbreakable blank expression but this time, there seemed to be a patronizing sort of air to it. "You men and your dirty minds." She said to no one in particular before she waved a dismissive hand at him and resumed walking.

Renji struggled to keep the pout from forming on his lips but then he realized no one was around to see him act childish. "Grrr I'm going to enjoy locking you up." He grunted with a bitter pout.

Rukia shrugged her white clad shoulder without interrupting her steps. "Of course Fuku-taichou-dono. No one should get a job they don't enjoy."

By now, Renji was scowling like a man scorned, and of course he was one. He couldn't wait to stick Rukia into the jail cell and get the whole thing over with, but curiosity demanded that he continue to have her clarify a few things. Risking the danger of appearing as a love-sick boy, Renji quashed his sense of humiliation and gently placed one of his large hands on Rukia's tiny shoulder. He could feel her delicate bone structure under his heavy hand and all of a sudden, the usual feeling of protectiveness flooded back. "Hey Rukia…..d'you love anyone?" He whispered, his voice melancholy and forlorn. He was surprised when he felt Rukia place one of her small pale hand on top of his. When Rukia's slender fingers tightened around his digits, Renji's heart started to beat at an eager, brisk pace.

"Renji….." This time, there was hidden pain in her voice.

Renji immediately enveloped her into an all-encompassing hug. "It's Ok," He murmered into her hair. "You can tell me." He felt something hot drop onto his arm, then cool in temperature before sliding down the curve of his limb and falling to the floor. It was then that Renji realized Rukia was shedding silent tears so he pulled her even tighter against his chest. "Its ok Rukia. I'm here." He crooned reassuringly.

"I-I.." Her voice was broken with tears, "I wanted a Chappy….but they sent me an ugly duck."

All of a sudden, Renji's nervous twitch in his eyes returned. "Fuck you Rukia." He said before shoving her behind bars and slamming the door.

Later that day, Renji found out that Rukia also loved pineapples, kittens, drawing, people with funny mustaches, and taking a long shower after a hard day of work. Apparently she loved everything, from the banal to the extraordinarily weird. But she really, REALLY loves Chappy.

Renji shook his head with defeat. "Kuchiki Rukia….." He started to get a migraine. "you're a woman with too much love."


End file.
